These past 9 weeks have been intense, my first week of maternity leave waiting in anticipation and uncertianty of what was coming my way, and these past eight filled with so much joy and love I can't even begin to put them into words. I knew it would go quickly and that before I knew it I would be going back to work even though my mind wasn't ready to comprehend what that meant. I knew I loved Annabelle before she came into the world, but now that she's here that love is so much stronger than I can express so the thought of leaving her for any amount of time makes me sad.
Around the 5th week of maternity leave I knew I wasn't necessarily the stay at home mom type. I could definately see myself working part time but I knew I needed to work because I truly enjoy what I do. Teaching is probably the best job to have if you want to work and raise a family and the Lord has provided me with an amazing job teaching Physical Education surrounded by wonderful Christian teachers and families. The nice part about Tony and I's situation is that he will drop her off at 9:30am and I will pick her up at 3:30pm so she gets to spend the morning with her daddy and 6 hours later she will be with me. I am leaving her with one of my best friends, a wonderful mother who treats Annabelle like her own, so my sadness although validated, is overshadowed by a thankful heart for this woman who will bless my child for the next 9 weeks.
Annabelle is proving to be a very smart baby and is showing us all sorts of personality reflecting both Tony and myself. During my pregnancy I would pray over Annabelle the entire drive downtown to school, asking the Lord for all sorts of things but mostly for good health and safe delivery. But I also prayed she would have a gentle spirit and reflect the peace of God and it's amazing how the Lord gave us a little girl so calm, happy, and gentle. Don't get me wrong, she has a temper that will make you laugh because it's so funny to see something so little get so mad over something so quickly. But when I put her to bed at night I am so thankful the Lord gave me a daughter already showing the Fruits of the Spirit and I continue to pray those over her each night as I rock her to sleep.
In the middle of the all this madness of raising a newborn we are also house hunting which has proven to be frustrating and disappointing making me want to stay holed up in our luxery apartment until the rapture. We have the best apartment in the world but are outgrowing it rapidly as toys, swings, and baby gear take over our living space. Every house we look at we question child care options, schooling, church, driving distance to work, and neither Tony or I have ever had to worry about those things when picking a place to live. He was either traveling with baseball 8 months out of the year and I don't think I ever stayed anywhere longer than a year to have to worry about it. Every house we have liked and actually attempted to purchase was snatched up just before we could make a bid and it has been so stupid...for example, just yesterday we found out that a house we put a bid on and actually had a great chance of getting we lost because someone came in and offered them CASH for the house...ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? Who pays cash for a house???
But the Lord is in control, we know this in our spirits, it's my crazy flesh and all these hormones pumping through my body that want to get worked up and go egg the house once the new owners move in. I'm kidding- I completely trust our house is out there, or a piece of land for us to build on, we just have to be patient and believe in the perfect timing of our Lord.
Well, it's been a great 9 weeks and every prayer and been answered in regards to the end of my pregnancy, delivery, and the first weeks that come with new parenting. I am so thankful we were able to have this time together and I am looking forward to the summer break I pray comes quickly. I am looking forward to seeing the kids at school and spending the warm days of spring outside playing games and celebrating the end of the year- but the best part of my day will be seeing her face at 3:30.
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